Are you blushing? Are you embarrassed to talk about sex or sexual pleasure? According to the American Sexual Health Association (didn’t know this existed), September is Sexual Health Month, lets celebrate!!!! The theme for 2020 is “sexual pleasure in times of Covid-19”.
As I am writing this article, my daughter is flushing with embarrassment and saying, “mom, you have never felt comfortable talking about sex, why now?” If you are my age (50+), you probably remember that sex talk was taboo with our parents, and there was hardly any discussion about the birds and the bees.
When the time comes for parents to talk to their children, they don’t have role models for being parents of sexually open teenagers. Despite what they think they should do, a part of them feels it is inappropriate to include open sexual discussions in their child’s upbringing.
One generation’s prohibitions have a way of becoming the next generation’s inhibitions. In my opinion, don’t wait for your child to be in a relationship to talk about sex. Start the conversation sooner than later. Try to be more open in a discussion.
Recently, I connected with a group of great women, including Laura Rothschild, a sexologist, which opened me up to a whole new world of exploratory. Why do we, as a society, find it so difficult to talk about sex or even be curious about it? The topic of sex often brings up deep-rooted shame, disgust, confusion, and anger in people. Why do we feel so uncomfortable or shamed when sex is a natural, pleasurable, and necessary part of our well being and happiness.
Sexual Health is not just a physical thing but an emotional, spiritual, and physical embodiment.
Not to mention, according to many psychologists, feeling good physically can also have a positive effect on confidence levels.
Having intercourse two times a week means that you are somewhat physically active. Sex requires you to use your muscles, increase heart rate, and release human growth hormones in women, which can help boost muscle mass. The physical aspects of sexual activity are all around great for making us look and feel younger and stronger.
Since our current situation forces us to be home more than ever, what better time than celebrate and promote a pleasurable sexual life? After all, life must go on, and sexuality is a vital part of human beings.
Since the theme of Sexual Health month is sexual pleasure, I would like to recommend some ways to figure out more satisfaction with your partner. What are both of your turn-ons and turn-offs? Have you ever asked? Some couples have been married over 30-40 years and still don’t know the answers to these questions. GO AHEAD, GET OUT OF YOUR COMFORT ZONE.
Games to get your juices flowing
What You Need: A large bag full of costume props — for example, a fireman’s hat, a cheerleader’s skirt, and a maid’s feather duster.
How to Play: Reach into the bag. Whichever prop you grab is a role play fantasy you have to act out.
Why: There’s nothing wrong with indulging in some cheesy porn stereotypes. And a little role play never hurt anybody!
You need: A clock or an egg timer.
How to play: Pick a time interval — 20 minutes, let’s say. For whatever interval you choose, tease each other with kissing, touching, and other forms of foreplay. But no matter what, absolutely do not allow penetration until that much time has elapsed.
Why: Most busy couples have foreplay down to a science, or rather, a routine. “Time Bomb” refocuses you on the pre-game show, the part that used to be so much fun before you lived together. You’ll be surprised by how much slowing down changes things. You get really creative and really turned on.
BEACH BLANKET BINGO
You need: A big towel or blanket and a bottle of Spell Botanicals love oil or cream.
How to play: Spread your towel on the bed or carpet and grease each other up with massage oil — legs, torso, breasts, everywhere. Now roll around for awhile and… see what happens.
Why: You will really be surprised at the difference a little lubricant makes in the feeling of skin on skin. Sure, it’s a little messy. But worth it.
Variation: If you have a favorite secluded spot, this is fun to do outdoors, even on your own patio.
Tip: Don’t put mint or eucalyptus oil on sensitive genital areas. But if you have a non-irritating lubricant, greasing up the sexual equipment can be part of the fun. But remember that oil-based lubricants, including massage oil, can degrade latex. So don’t play this game if you’re using condoms or a diaphragm.
Games on Apps
- Dirty Game – Hot Truth or Dare
- Pleasure machine
Toys to get your juices flowing
Like all things pleasure, the more you play, the more expansive your capacity for pleasure becomes! Enjoy!